1-11-2016 Stem Cell Transplant Pics & Video

Well I got my Stem Cell Transplant at 2pm and with all the prepping and so on it only took 45 minutes. Everything went so well I can post videos shortly after.

It was amazing to see the process in person. My Stem Cells in the bag and the nitrogen chamber that they were in. They looked different than they did when they were collected. They go through a treatment process which I can't remember all the details of before I get them back.

I had 4 bags that had to be injected through a unique process because I have a PICC line and not an access port. Then actually pump the Stem Cells back into the IV with another syringe. They could do it another way, but it would take around an hour per bag. This picture is almost like I'm saving my own life cause their my Stem Cells. I'll find out more about when I get my baby shots and so on later. That's how wiped my immune system was. I'll consider it that my body never knew it had cancer and leave it at that.

1-6-16 A Fight Full of Fuck

One of my instructors once told his class in less than a couple of sentences that if they could learn to embrace in combat with the same intensity they fuck with, that they would understand the engagement of combat with more depth, sensitivity, relaxation, confidence and less fear.

My reiteration of those statements is that in our most intimate moments we are in perfect harmony with our partner and QUIT is not part of our vocabulary. The climax heightens as the passions boil and merge into another state of euphoria and the fuck goes on, never ending until that ultimate pleasure is achieved. 

It’s the same with combat. It is a violent embrace that for some has the same intensity. This battle for domination has no QUIT in it. This violent climax heightens until Victory is won or your opponent is dead.

Fear is an emotion that is equal in both sexual and combative engagements. Fear is ever present in our daily lives that you’ve most likely experienced once again today. The car on the highway that cuts in front of you nearly running you off the road. The broadcast on the news about the people that lost their lives in a fire. E.coli outbreaks in restaurants that you frequent. The threat of an attack if you’re in the wrong place at the wrong time. Someone that you love that is stricken with disease. When you let fear control you, you lose. When you allow fear to guide you, you win.

My reiteration of those statements has helped me prepare for the unexpected without a spit of fear in my heart, for there is no QUIT in me! I might get startled for a moment before I snap and then the fight is on and I will not QUIT, for it is not allowed!

This is going to be a very tough round of chemotherapy over the upcoming weeks and everything I’ve trained and learned about Fear and Quit is going to be tested, make no mistake about it. The only one that is able to get in my way is Me! That is an obstacle that I’ve seen many family members and friends make some very difficult choices between rounds in their lives. I’ve learned some very important lessons in winning as well as quitting, with and without dignity.

I find it kind of funny that we can go anywhere to learn to fight in a variety of fighting styles, but we’re on our own when we want to learn how to fuck. It is one of the few natural things that we still struggle to teach ourselves how to do. I apologize for using an improper term, but my interpretation is people that have sex haven’t conquered their fear of it. People that fuck have no fear and are confident in facing a challenging intimate embrace with their partner, through whatever it takes with no quit in their hearts.

Another instructor taught me a lesson about quit when she hammered her student, a member of her fight team about pushing through weakness, facing fear HEAD ON without quit in your heart, but QUIT he did, and he deserved all the embarrassment he got because he not only let himself down, he let the other members on his team down. They had to face a forfeit and now needed to work harder to in order to win because someone had that QUIT in them. Thank you Rhonda! Should you ever read this, Thank You for sharing with the world that was listening!

If I’ve struck a chord or pinched a nerve in you, GOOD! For me this is about my NOW and if I’m able to help you prepare for your NOW when it comes then I hope it serves you as well as it has served me!

I have known so many people that succeeded in so many things, but gave up on themselves when it got tough. Well I’m here to show you different so you have another great example to compare with.

I LOVE you! And I lOVE that you LOVE me in return. I love serving you. I love your company. I love being there for you when I’m needed. You are what makes me Great! I’m just a reflection of your greatness right back at you!

And, I’ll be dammed if some fucking disease is going to stand in OUR fucking way of the greatness WE share together!

I refuse to stand down and let this disease take ME away from YOU!

That is how you have to feel when making certain choices in our lives! Not with shitty metaphors and fortune cookie crap, but with real EMOTION! Real LOVE that causes real PAIN that really fucking hurts and makes you mad as fuck and ready for battle! Whether it’s facing closure during your end of life planning, or struggling through life and its many complications in your life or the life of someone you love.

As I sit here and think about what is in store for me I reflect on our many teachers that gave of themselves and taught us (most in secretive silence) very difficult lessons about fighting a different kind of fight. A fight where it’s you against you. The Strongest you VS. The Weakest you. A lesson that I learned from a great man that just happened to be my Father, is that you’re only as strong as your weakest link. That can be applied in every aspect in our lives. Very wise words to Heed!

I AM!

I am, that I am, Eternal I am.
I am an Invincible Source of Strength and Power.
Nothing can touch ME!
I Reign Supreme Over Everything!

1-9-2016 Update & Changing of the PICC Dressing Video

Everything has been going very well so far. Thank you everyone that is ordering a Team Tarallo Shirt. You're thoughts and prayers mean more to me than a shirt does, but it represents a symbol of strength and determination that more people need to see as they get challenged in life because we are the examples of both our younger and older generation. When the time comes to make certain choices we will all have a reflection on how others managed theirs. I'm honored to share my experience with all of you so more of it is clear to you and without so many blanks to fill in on your own and many more holistic options that have been around for decades to centuries.

Well, when I got my PICC Line (peripherally inserted central catheter) put in on Tuesday 1-5-16 it had a tugging feeling to it that was uncomfortable when I turned my wrist, bent my elbow or dipped my shoulder. I was told that it would take a day then it feel fine. The PICC line was inserted just a tad too much and that was causing the tugging feeling. When they changed the dressing and made the adjustments I had asked if I could shoot a video, but France wasn't there to do it, but I do have the changing of the dressing after a couple of trips into the shower with it wrapped up. Between moisture and condensation it is destined to need to be redressed and I have to wear the PICC for the 3 weeks that I'm here. So here is the 5 min video of the redressing. I'm not that fat, its the camera and gown I swear, but I am that bald! 

I've been able to exercise in the gym that they have here which is only a treadmill and a bike, but it gets the job done. My goal is to go in the gym 4 times a day and get a half hour workout in each time. This way I'm moving, keeping my circulation going, getting some sort of a heart rate up. As the days go on I may not even be able to go into the gym as my platelet level drops.

150,000: Activity as I wish
50,000 - 150,000: Bicycle, Treadmill and Weights (no restrictions)
20,000 - 50,000: Bicycle (light resistance), Treadmill (no incline), Weights/Resistance Bands (light), Walking as tolerated.
5,000 - 20,000: No use of the exercise room (no bicycle or treadmill), activities in my room, moving arms and legs seated or in bed.

I'm not trying to push myself, just trying to keep moving so I have my strength later on when I'm really weak which is in the upcoming days. France got a nice shot of my light idea of a workout wearing my Team Tarallo Hoodie.





More to come as the days pass. I'm trying to keep it interesting and less like a daily diary of events.

Anthony