My Teachers

My Teachers:

I’ve learned to be this strong because of you and I’d like to talk about that. Something has always hit the fan somewhere along the line that brings people together. In my opinion, more for comfort than for strength and planning. 

Go grab a tissue cause I had a side of gratitude for my attitude during lunch today and allow me to introduce you to some of my teachers that have taught me about fighting spirit because I was willing to look, listen and Learn.

We’re not the largest family in the history of large families and we’ve all seen our share of losing our loved ones and carrying them through their last stages of life. In my opinion it just doesn't cut it when you say to someone dealing with death or disease that so and so went through that. Where did the fighting spirit come from. How deep did those before us dig to muster the fighting spirit they had? More importantly why that knowledge wasn't shared?

Team Tarallo-Berlinghieri - Aunt Mary:

I was very young and as expected didn’t understand a thing when it came to Auntie, until I got older. Some of us were lucky enough to have watched her walk on her own steam. Others while she used a walking aid and then into a chair and finally lying in bed and needing help to get both in and out of it.

Auntie had a team that wasn’t going to quit on her and leave her behind or ship her off to a home for no reason at all. I, just like you grew up watching Auntie struggle to enjoy playing with us kids, knitting us sweaters and hats, getting us kids little toys to run around the yard with. We became a part of her strength and she gave us strength by teaching us how she beat her disability. When her time came to live in a nursing home a lot of us stood by her side at all times. Others like myself got wrapped up in the daily grind and didn’t really visit her much. Others not at all.

Auntie’s winning team was her family especially Doris, her brother-in-law Tony, her nieces Ann Marie, Angela and Bubs, Her sister Anna, Cousin Mary, Auntie Angie, Her Brothers Mike, Bobby, & Joey, her extended family of cousins and nephews, all us kids  and her doctors that tried to keep her in the best shape possible at the time. That was her team and it won! For those that stuck by her side she beat the nursing home for years.

The lessons that Auntie taught me I’ll never forget and always remember. That was more than a team it was a Unit!

Team Arciero:

The Arciero’s are friends of mine that Frank and I grew up with. Our friends father had passed and sometime after his is mother had fallen ill. Nursing care was recommended, but the family pulled together and teamed up and made sure that their mother was able to be cared for at home. That takes a lot of strength and support from the other players on your team. They managed to honor their mother’s wishes until it was her time to pass. They never let their plan fall apart, they managed the difficulties that you run into putting teamwork into play and they Won.

Team Tarallo-Berlinghieri - Aunt Doris:

Aunt Doris was a very strong woman and the support she had from Ann Marie, Angela and Bubs is what carried her through the most difficult challenges she’d face. She found a doctor that she really liked and respected Dr. Kleykamp and she followed through with the best of intentions and rarely faltered. She sang songs throughout the day and that happiness and faith in God would resonate through you in her presence.

Auntie's Team worked together and got the results that were needed for her to live at home, but also with some independence until such a time came. That takes a lot of trust from both the Team and the fighter. I’ll always remember what you taught me Auntie. Your strength in finding happiness out of desperation and suffering is my strength now.

Ann Marie, Angela & Bubs your team work together (no matter how difficult it may have been at times) you pulled through and you pulled through strong. That’s a lesson that Alzheimer’s couldn’t make me forget. You weren’t just a team you were a Force of Power!

Team Perham – Virginia Perham:

Another friend of Frank and I, as well as my mother and father’s. Virginia was a very independent woman all her life. She raised her kids on her own and did a wonderful job passing her values in life on to them. When Virginia was diagnosed with Cancer she busted out her fight plan with her team.

Her daughter Franny, Son-in-Law Kim, Son Tom and the team of VNA’s they had helped her fulfill her wishes and beat this disease at home. Through the thick and thin they made it happen. Her Team gave her the luxury of passing on at home with the people she loved and pass in peace she did. Everyone worked together to help make this happen.

Team Tintoni – Paul Tintoni "The One Man Army!":

Paul is a friend of mine that I’ve known since 3^rd grade. We shared the fear of the backhands that we got from both of our sets of parents from the trouble we caused and shared the love and support from each of our families as we grew up.

Sometimes in life we make mistakes and take a wrong turn here and there and my friend Paul was one of them. Without getting into the details of his vices, he overcame his addictions and Mentored hundreds of lost souls through AA and NA. Paul had a way of touching your soul that gave you the strength to both fight and believe in yourself. And belief was the key.

Sometimes when all you’re good at is failing it seems to be all that you know. Paul wasn’t going to stand for any of that and that’s why he made such an effective difference in the lives that he touched.

Paul was the delivery driver that died from an accident on the job on July 7th, 2009 during a routine delivery at the Barking Crab. Hundreds of his friends, family, and supporters were paled in comparison by the number of people that showed up to pay their respects to this one man that took of himself to change their lives for the better, no matter what it took of him.  

One Man did so much for so many self-destructive men and women so they can have normalcy back in their lives, drug free. One Man! You don’t forget a lesson like that, EVER! It was an honor to hear him speak during his AA anniversaries and watch him move the entire room.

Rest In Peace my Friend for you Will Never Be Forgotten!!!

Team Tarallo – Tommy & Barbara:

What goes through your mind when you’re faced with a tragedy of that magnitude? Tommy was the force. He will kick the ass of asses off whatever stood in his way! As the dust settled Barbara dug deep, real deep and found strength in Tommy, strength in prayer and wasn’t going down for nothing!

She built the first Team Tarallo in my opinion. Barbara built a dedicated team of supporters with the best assistant Coaches available Chipper & Bobbi, the best doctors and hospitals. Family came together to assure that we’d pick our wounded warrior brother up with Barbara Heading the team as Coach. Tommy does the work that he needs to do and his Team supports him all the way through.

The support that Tommy got through Care Pages from everyone held his spirit up so high that there was no breaking it down! Team Tarallo moved a mountain out of their way and they continue to move it each and every time it gets back in the way.

Team Abrams - Al Abrams “The Mentor”:

I first met Mr. Abrams at work in late 2003. Al was known as the Ambassador. Al would stop and talk with everyone, everywhere. Al is well known, well respected and Al knows a little about everybody and everybody knows a little about Al. Those of you that know me know perfectly well that I drudged through my troubles ineffectively doing nothing more than causing myself more problems than necessary. That is until I met Mr. Abrams.

Al knew my story not just because I talk loud and you can’t help overhear, but because he’s seen it time and time again. All I was doing was setting myself up to fail over and over again. Al took me under his wing and taught me that what I was doing wasn’t wrong to feel, but I wasn’t going to get very far with my nasty attitude and disposition. Even though I’ve been told that all my life. Al showed me how to structure a plan that would work if I designed it to succeed. Baby steps in the beginning, bigger ones later on.

I had so much anger, frustration and depression going on during that time in my life that I was shutting everyone around me out and shutting myself down. I am a hard worker and I got that strong work ethic from my Father, my Uncles, Cousins, Co-Workers and other folks that had the opportunity to train with me to learn to be as good as me at my job. Al helped bring me out of myself and he helped retrain my brain to respond in more appropriate ways that would earn me respect, trust, confidence and above all Pride in myself. 

Once some of the court matters started to drop off I had less to manage on my plate and I really did benefit from what Al was teaching me all that time. If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got. He told that to me every morning when he walked by. 

Aligning myself up with new challenging career objectives isn’t easy when you have no good study habits and you’re being self-taught at a self-paced level. Al is very educated and thanks to him sharing with me I was able to succeed in my pursuit of the necessary certifications that I need to take my career where I want.

Al’s father lived a very, very full and challenging life that consisted of a number of health complications and Al and I shared the same compassion for our parents as caregivers which is another thing that brought us closer together as friends. My mother was having her problems and Al’s father was having his and we would share strength between us at times to get ourselves through. One of Al’s major complaints about my life at the time was about getting my driver’s license back. Think of the places you can take your mother he would say. 

Al changed my life, improved my outlook of it, changed my personality for the better and taught me that I can have what I want out of life if I approach it with the right plan. If I have to build a Team to reach that goal then I build a Team that is dedicated to win.

My greatest thanks to Mr. Abrams is that he helped bring France into my life by helping me to change from what I was into who I am.

I know as well as anyone that a spirit like France steers clear from the old me. 

Thank you Al for one of my life's greatest prizes My France.

Larry Morse - "The Gentle Giant":

I became friends with Larry at work. Larry was part of one of the hardest working teams onsite at any given time. Larry was a Mover. Larry was like the second strongest man you'll meet. The strongest was his cousin Roger.

In my work sometimes I can't finish until the office is setup and that takes time and I never had a problem getting my hands dirty even if it wasn't my job. When Mr. Abrams retired I inherited the job that he left and had to fill some very big shoes.

Larry and I had a playful bond at work that took the edge off of a very difficult day. Sometimes a simple laugh or ball breaking was all it took to finish breaking your back all day working with injuries, but the job got done.

Larry was 6'5" and if you didn't know him you'd be wise to stay out of his way. Larry was a gentle giant with bear paws for hands. It was always a laugh to watch him struggle with a cribbage peg with his bear mitts. Larry was also a very good cribbage player. Larry and I also shared the same caregivers struggles and leaned on one another time and time again.

So what is Larry's story? On October 8th, 2012 Larry had a split second to make a choice that would change his life forever. He and his family were asleep in their home as it was burning down. Everyone had gotten out so everyone thought, but Larry's mother Norma who was recovering from hip surgery was still in the house, alone. I wasn't there, but I see it play in my head over and over again that Larry took off like a blur of light back into his house to save his mother's life.

A family member said that Larry died a hero when he ran back into his burning home to try and save his mother and instead perished with her while shielding her from the flames.

Larry fearlessly stared death in the face without a shadow of doubt in his heart. I know that if Larry couldn't get his mother out he wasn't going to let her die like that alone.

 It is an honor to share some time in my life with such a quality of man with the True Spirit of a True Warrior!

God Bless you Laurence Morse Jr.

France Martins – “The Kindred Spirit” and “One Woman Army”:

The old me has no place in France’s world. It’s only because of change that I am fortunate enough to have such a powerful loving woman by my side. Our souls touched at a level that could only be one thing. True Love. 

France has done more on her own with little help from anyone than any couple of people I know combined. She sets a goal and sees it through. She got her degree and worked tireless hours in the process and met me at the beginning of her final semester of college and still found time to share together and also help me improve my study habits. I believed in France. I watched her accomplishments in Drum Corp and took notice of both her dedication and determination to win. And win she did. She was part of a winning team during her age out year of Drum Corp with the Glassmen. When you watch the performance all you see is spirit and everyone working in unity with one another. You see the coaches really coaching and you see the results through performance, a performance that Wins.

France believed in me. France understood my struggle to learn something I knew little about so I could step up to the dugout and ask the coach to throw me in with the big boys. France believed in me when I doubted myself and I let the pressures I was under interfere with my study goals. I learned from France how to manage my pressure better to gain the progress that I’ve made so far in my career objectives. She did a balancing act with the time she had to share time with me, study, attend classes, work and do her internship. In the end her strong work ethic earned her a degree, and the job she wanted with the company that she wanted to work for.   

When my mother got sick, this was only 3 weeks after we met when my mother went into diabetic shock on Christmas Eve 2006. Luckily I was home and got my mother to the hospital. The tenderness that France shared with me was completely different than what I’ve ever known. Everything that Mr. Abrams was telling me about getting my driver’s license back was really making some sense now and France was there to help me through it. I know how to drive, but France was there to help take my mother to Dr. appointments instead of taking a taxi or the T, go shopping for clothing that she needed, go out to eat and enjoy some of that normalcy that was missing living without a driver’s license. And also without reverting back to the same bad habits that caused me to lose my license in the first place. 

Thank you France because without your confidence in me I would surely doubt myself.

Team Sityodtong:

This is a team of fighters, coaches, training partners, newbies, all with the same agenda and that is to kick some ass. This is about a fight in the ring with another man that is training to bust you up, lay you down and leave you down. Your coaches know what you need to work on if you’re going to take on the fight. Your Fight Team puts together a training plan that you follow to the T. You puke your way through it if need be, but you do it. Then you rest up and do it all over again.

Your sparring partners open up on you. Friends of yours that you’ve started to grow with together in the gym are trying to test your emotions and ability to beat down a friend or a coach with complete disregard. A partner that knocks your ass out, helps you up and explains what you’ve done wrong then knocks you the !#$ out until you get it right. If he doesn’t you’ve got no right stepping into the ring with that other guy. We fight to win at Team Sityodtong! We take what we get Win, Loss, or Draw, but make no mistake about it, we’re coming back better, stronger and with more experience thanks to the lessons we learned from the last time.

That’s the fight a doctor will challenge you with. You need to eat better. You need to exercise. You need to bring your numbers down. You yadda, yadda, yadda him and wind up back in his office a failed patient in worse shape than when you left.

Team Sityodtong has taught me that deep hearted discipline that one must have in order to prepare to battle, with anything especially a disease. I never got my opportunity to start in the amateur circuit because my father was sick and helping to take care of things at home was far more important than throwing punches around in the gym. I have no regrets! I haven’t any because I learned to help other’s try to fight their battles better because they needed a coach. They need a coach that wasn’t going to give up on them, but knows when to throw in the towel if need be.

I watched my Coach Kru Mark walk his fighter into the ring without a doubt in their hearts that the fight was theirs. Fighters learn to listen to their corner (Doctors). Fighters learn a set of patterns that set their opponents up for failure (Combinations) and then move in for the KO.

Slip him and kick his leg out. Get him in the clinch and break a few ribs while you’re in there and for good measure before he falls to the ground give him something to remember you by and open his brow with an elbow for even daring to step into the same ring with you.

Summary:

That’s the Spirit I bring into this fight! That's the lessons that I've learned from those before me. I’ve just started so it’s only just begun. Everything I’ve learned from you and those before me will carry me and my Team through this.

That’s the Spirit behind the fight I bring!!!

This is Team Tarallo!